Friend$

Turns out, more than friendship, what many people we interact with in Lviv, outside of Bubbles, want is money ... sometimes LOTS of money. Here's an abbreviated, slightly edited, version of a recent conversation:
Him: "I can see you are good people. I have a great business that I'm going to let you in on, where you can make lots of money, and not do any work."
Us - we also have a great business with the potential for lots of money, but we know it requires LOTS of work: "uh-huh?"
Him: "I know a guy who is starting a construction business ... making luxury homes in Slovakia. All you have to do is give me $5 MILLION U.S. dollars ... there's no risk - just BIG profits."
Us: "First, we don't have five million dollars to give you..."
Him: "But you know wealthy Americans - and can get it!"
Us: "Second, we have never been to Slovakia. Third we aren't into luxury home building. Finally, we're busy with our own business and don't have time for this. Sorry, we're not interested."
Him: "Okay, okay, I know $5 million dollars is a lot ... but that is okay because I have another business, a factory, that you can invest in and I only need $300,000 U.S. dollars from you."
Us: "I'm sure there are lots of ways to make money in Ukraine, but we are focusing our efforts on self-serve and full-service laundromats. Sorry, we're not your guy. But, to help you out, if you have a detailed business plan, we're happy to review it and send it along to someone else who might be interested."
Him: "No, no. You - I want you to be my partner. I like your family and I want you to make the profits. The only risk is that if you don't give me the money in two days time, someone else will, and you'll miss out on all the profits."
Us - trying to maintain friendship, and yet be honest and firm that we really aren't interested: "Sorry, not interested. Leave us alone."
Him - perhaps desperate, perhaps a bit crazy: "Okay, but I will stop by your store at random times, give you out-dated appraisals on the nasty processed cake factory and dessert machines, call you day and night reminding you what great friends we are, and that this is a BIG chance you are missing out on. I'll even give you my house as collateral (worth a fraction of the sum asked for), and see you at church, so you can't get away from me!"
Us: "Awesome, thanks. It's so great making friends here."